On Sunday, my kids’ Sunday School teachers sent home a copy of the morning and evening prayer. So yesterday, I started the day by having my kids fold their hands and close their eyes respectfully in prayer, while I read it to them. It’s not very long and I thought it would be a good thing to do to get our day started. I had it all in my head about the way this should go. That was my first mistake. (Duh. It never goes the way I think it should go.)

I read the prayer and my son fidgeted like crazy during the entire prayer.  I was frustrated with him and said that I wish he would have paid attention. (Second BIG mistake.)

Before I even finished my sentence, my son asked for the paper and grabbed a pencil.  He told me it was going to be a good thing.  Thank goodness I calmly waited to see what he was going to do with that pencil.  (It could have been anything!)

All on his own, he wrote, ” I love Jesus.”

It took all of my strength not crumble into a heap on the floor.

He WAS listening and praying.  He can fidget and pay attention at the same time.  I was completely wrong!!!!  I said a silent prayer of thanks that my son taught me the best lesson: My son is listening and God is listening.  (even when it doesn’t seem like it to me.)

Lesson learned-AGAIN.



photo(1) copy( I wrote this 9 months ago in the midst of some pretty tough times. Miss (not so) Fearless didn’t have the courage to post it!  A lot of setbacks and miracles have transpired since I wrote this, but the feelings I had are worth examining. Here goes…)

I had to write today.  After reading another brilliant something written by Glennon Doyle Melton of Momastery, I just couldn’t come up with another excuse. Yes, I let my fears stop me from writing.  Funny, I can’t let my fears stop me from doing, but writing…that’s another story.

Today of all days, I received a big packet in the mail from the county mental health authority, welcoming my child into the system. My first response is fear and worry for my child and how he will be judged.  Well, really, it’s about my own judgement, isn’t it?

You can call it behavioral health, human development, mental health,… but it’s all the same.  I have my preconceived ideas of what that all means.  And it’s based on absolutely no real knowledge or research or experience.  However, based on my current experience and knowledge, those labels are just a way to say that I can get help there. And I need help.

My job is to be a warrior Mom.  I didn’t ask for that job.  I didn’t want that job.  But nonetheless, that is who I am.  Every single day. And I know there are so very many of us being warriors for our children.

I am happy to say that my son just began a new treatment program, in spite of my first response to it.  At first I was angry and I decided it wasn’t for my child.  It was for someone else’s child.   Thank God I was able to get past my own fears and preconceived ideas and actually find out about the treatment program.  We needed it.  I needed it.  I need big time help in learning how to best help my son.

Even in the treatment center, I had to be a warrior Mom.  My nature is to follow the rules and make the best of things.  Today, I fought for a different therapist, one who I feel will truly “see” my beautiful child.  And then be able to help.  God made us all unique one-of-a-kind masterpieces. My child is precious and is crying out for help in the only ways he knows how to do that.  I don’t know how to help him professionally.  But I do know how to fight for him as a warrior.  And I do know how to fight for the well-being and safety of my little family.

Is this treatment program going to help?  I do not know yet.  But I do know that what we have been doing is not working.  The doctor we have been seeing doesn’t “see” my child.  I am hoping and praying that the new therapists and doctors will “get” him.  And help him.  But really, I hope they help me change in order to help him.

And so I wait and pray and hope.  And I swallow my pride and put away my fears and go forth into the unknown. Again.

See you out there.


With autumn and the start of school, for me, there’s always a feeling of optimism.

In regard to my son, I also feel worry. My son will be in a traditional classroom this year. It is a big transition. There is so much unknown. Will he be able to handle sitting still? How will his social interactions be with other kids? Are the teachers ready for his reactions? Can he learn in spite of all his challenges?

I have to let him go and trust that he is in good hands. I have emailed and gone to meetings with the school team and made sure my guy has continued his progress throughout the summer. I have worked with therapists and doctors. And I have prayed. And will continue to do all of the things in my power for both of my kids.

Every morning, I will pick up my warrior mom mantle and keep going.


Both of my kids are excited about going to school.  I am thankful.

Wishing you a successful school year.


Really, this is all that matters.

Happy Mother’s Day!





Showing a lack of fear; intrepid.

Synonyms:  intrepid, undaunted, dauntless, brave, bold, daring

Little Miss Fearless. (well, I try to be)

My life has gone places I never imagined.  I am very recently divorced after thinking it would never happen to me. Surviving a broken heart and shattered trust is only one part. Facing my uncertain future as a single Mom in a new place after having left my career, well, that is another part.  Oh, and tackling the labyrinth of managing the special needs of my son while working to give my daughter equal attention is yet another part.

Some days I charge forward!  Other days, I can barely move an inch.  But every day, I thank God for the chance to be the Mom of such beautiful and joyful children!!! My story is one of faith and a (not so) fearless approach to all the challenges that lay before me.


Photos by me.

I always welcome your comments.